Jot clears his throat: So, Yarbo. In your own words, what is the inspiration of the Realm of Chicora?

Yarbo: In my own words? I thought you wanted me to read these little cards you made.

Jot (whispering): Put the cards in your own words, or the free drinks stop!

Yarbo: You know, "The inspiration for this world was based on a Native American named Chicora. When early explorers came to what would become South Carolina, they encountered Chicora, who told them fantastic tales, including a description of lizardmen. In the 1980's, a man in Calhoun County, South Carolina swore to have seen a lizardman fitting the same description in the swamp. This idea began the process, of imaging a colonial city in a New World where even the most fantastic tale might have a germ of truth."

Jot: Those aren't your own words. You just read the bloody card!

Yarbo: That's not true. I added "you know" to the beginning.

Jot (grabs the cards away): And I added that ale to your tab. Now, if you were a gamer or a simmer…

Yarbo (pouting): But I'm not. I'm just a NPC. Don't even get a decent character sheet. Or to roll the dice.

Jot (a little louder): Now, if you were a gamer, how would you create a character?

Yarbo: Dragon's blood, I don't know. If I could make a character, I guess it would be something different from me. You know, I have always been the hero type. And the ladies man. I guess I would write for someone completely out of character. Broaden my horizons. Walk in someone else's shoes, you know. Actually, it sounds kind of fun. Maybe I could write for a rogue, or one of you silly Halfling types. It could be a problem that you don't wear shoes…

Jot: We preferred to be called "Folke" instead of "Halfling", thank you. Now, the next question…

Yarbo: I could sneak around, eat too many breakfasts, and spend all my time in those little people massage parlors like you do…

Jot: Next question! What goes into a character?

Yarbo: Besides the massage parlors, you mean? Well, for the most part, anything you want. You figure out if you want to play an elf, half-elf, half-orc, dwarf, gnome, human, or, er, folke. Then you pick up a character class. Paladin, ranger, rogue, sorcerer, wizard, cleric, barbarian. Or even a bard, if you can't pick anything heroic. Personally, I believe everyone would want to be a handsome, former warrior, present folksinger like myself.

Jot (sarcastically): That's likely. So what is the deal with the simming business?

Yarbo: Are you sure I couldn't peek at those little cards again? OK, don't get in a huff! You can be a gamer and participate in life and times at Praxis City, and there is also this writing group. Doom Lounge Writing Project. I guess each person writes about once a week. Sometimes more. Basically, your character could do anything they wanted. Say I wanted to burn the city down…

Jot: That's not right! You don't do events that change everyone's life. At least not on that scale. You can have your character just about do anything that's within the logical realm of your Sims background. And E-Mail Simming takes place on a list server.

Yarbo: Which is like Starla - she's a server. She serves the best ale, and she's the prettiest darn elf…

Jot: List servers are programs that you send the log to, and it in turn sends it to the rest of the group. The Doom Lounge Writing Project is a non-profit organization, so we tend to use free list servers. Like our magnificent hosts at yahoo.

Yarbo (peeking at Jot's notes, and displaying his nearly empty glass): So what are the differences between the Realm of Chicora and the usual D&D world? Like the, um, elbs?

Jot: Elbs? You mean elves? Where did you learn to read, in the Lounge's bathroom stall? Well, to answer the question you almost asked, our elves typically break down into two groups: the Stoics, and the Freeholders. Stoics resemble the Vulcans of Star Trek, with limited emotional output and a superiority complex. The other extreme is the Freeholders, which contain a zest for life, and concern for the environment. Think of better smelling hippies. Half-elves are accepted by the elves, but there is a prejudice that they are inferior due to their Ancient Script, which states that all elves came from the stars, and that only those of pure elven blood would be able to travel back to their Ancient Home in the stars. Those of half-elf blood often affiliate themselves with elven families, but are just as prone to take to the life of wandering. Wandering half-elves can be rogues, bards, or even pirates. Some have a passion for finery that includes owning the best vineyards and wineries. Regardless, no self-respecting elf player would listen to your rendition of "Ode to a Small Green Lump of Clay I Found in My Armpit."

Yarbo: That's a classic! And if you are going to insult me - and not order me another drink, I might add - I am out of here!

Jot: Fine! Thanks for nothing! (Muttering to himself) That's the last time I miss a deadline….anyway, to wrap things up, We Halflings are crosses between the nomadic wanderers of 3rd edition D&D, the hobbits of Tolkien, and a good Irish/Celtic mix. We also prefer to be called Folke, as who would really enjoy being called a Halfing and hold your head with pride?

Gnomes are the Ferengi of this world. Still very inventive; Leonardo Da Vinci would have been a gnome. Gnomes tend to have two extremes; the capitalist and the inventor, although there are many variations along that spectrum. Gnome sea-traders tend to be smugglers, and the best pawn shops, locksmiths, clockmakers, and glassblowers tend to be gnomish.

Burg, gnomish bartender: (walking by) And don't forget bartenders!

Jot: Well, if you include Gnomish Stout, you have a point. Anyway, dwarves are dwarves, for the most part. Ever seen the Confederate re-enactors? Well, the dwarves here are mostly the children of veterans of the War of the Crowns, where their Forge Clan was on the losing side. They are exiled from their mountain home, and long for days of glory, often found in bars and hum-drumming over what would have happened if Gilliam Longbeard had chosen another type of weapon in the Battle of Gettings Pass, or any other scenario that could have resulted in their clan's victory. Humans can be from the Old World, as in typical D&D civilization, Northlander mercs, or barbarians from the New World, brown-skinned and occasionally prone to lycanthropy. Half-orcs, as stated above, suffer the worst prejudice, and are commonly more restricted that the rest of the civilized races. If too many of them are like Yarbo, one could easily justify…hey, don't throw things at me! I'll tell Uncle Fafnir!